Intentionally Unexpected
No longer shall this site be the domain of half-assed attemps and being serious AND crazy delusional rambling.
Going forward there will be only rambling.
Also, we’re now http://proehl.us/joshnbev, but you knew that since you’re here already. UPDATE YOUR BOOKMARKS!
Doing tech support isn’t always the best job in the world. But it’s better when you get to have a little fun with it. As an example here is a ticket response that I sent out today:
Our apologies for the zombie message invasion. We have uncovered the source of the infection and are working to repair it for you. Because the issue is server-side it will just begin working one day, so you should try to delete messages periodically just to see if it’s working. (Sometimes it will even work before the fix too, it’s sort of random.)
So basically, like with any zombie infestation, just keep trying, they’ll stay down eventually. And try not to get bit, that just makes it worse.
Yep, that’s exactly what you want to hear from you tech support team right? Hope I made your day a bit brighter!
Also, I love it when they give me straight lines like “I don’t know how you’ll respond to this, but…” because it lets me do this:
I think I will reply… in wookie:
wwahhowo ohwowoor rcooananahwhrr rahoworcrarrwo.Oh, that’s not what you meant. Via email of course!
We actually proceeded to carry on the rest of the support interaction in wookie, which is really quite impressive. “ROFL” takes a lot more to say in wookie though, it’s just not a terse language.
Yeah, there are things I’ll miss about doing support.
There’s been all this hubbub about the TSA and their “Would you like the naked irradiated pictures or the free gropes?” policy. So far I haven’t had the fun of going up against either. This disappoints me.
Yes, that’s right. I said “disappoints”. I’m looking forward to it! What’s wrong with me? Why, I wear a kilt of course! The options are endless!
“We’ve got an opt out here!!“… Oh, so you want to play that game?
“Oh, don’t be coy about it. I know you just want to see what’s worn under a kilt.” might get a blush, but I want to go with something more like ? “A kilt check? Sweet, haven’t had that done in a while. Usually I only let redheads in peasant outfits lift my kilt, but you look like a cute enough fella.”
I was really hoping that the last time I flew I’d get it. “Hey, I know I haven’t seen my wife in 2 months, thanks for helping me get warmed up!” might have been fun. In the game of “how to make a government employee blush” you really have to step up your game these days.
Actually the most fun would be just to go with “We’ve got a kilt check here!!“, but you do have to be careful calling too much attention over too wide an area. I think it’s better to make just one single agent a little nutty rather than go after the whole bunch.
So c’mon TSA. I’m flying out of SJC next Friday. Gird your loins for battle, ’cause laying your hands on mine is only gonna be fun for one of us!
This is a kind of a random strean-of-consciousness post I wrote while sitting around waiting in a mall a while back. I cant bring myself to delete it, but I can’t quite work up the energy to tie it all together either. However, I’m tired of it sitting in my drafts folder. Here it is, straight from my brain, raw and unedited:
I’m currently wearing three things I love. I love them for very similar reasons, and in every case it has to do with what they allow me to do, and how they perform their function seamlessly and stay out of my way. I may also make a mention of how they fail me from time to time.
The first item is my Utilikilt, workman’s model, color black.
I love this thing. It has pockets in exactly the right places, hangs exactly how I’d want it to, and is utterly indestructible. I don’t have to worry about damaging it, and when I need one of the items I’m carrying they are perfectly placed right at arms length in their pockets.
My only complaint about the workmans model: lack of the “modesty snap” that holds it closed in high winds. It’s generally heavy enough to hold it’s own, but I have to mentally prepare myself to make sure the wind doesn’t catch me unawares. This is it’s only flaw! As clothing goes I can’t erally think of something that works better for my day-to-day use, and is as comfortable. Form Follows Function indeed!
Item two: my Glock model 26 pistol.
I love this gun. I can carry it all day and only have to make small allowances in my wardrobe and movements. The Glock is my favorite handgun because of it’s operations. Dead simple if I needed it, no chance it’s going to confuse me or be difficult to operate under stress. It easily operates as an extension of my arm, no user interface required. It provides the framework to add any additions that I want on to it, and will perform it’s function. Perfect functionality and perfect simplicity. It’s no wonder that Glock’s logo subtitle is “Perfection”.
Some would say that the flaw of the Glock handgun is it’s aesthetics, but I actually like the unassuming simplicity, so I’m not counting that as a flaw.
Item three: my iPhone.
As I type this I’m standing in a shopping mall waiting for someone, and it’s thanks to my iPhone that this is possible. It’s a perfect pocket-sized device that let’s you carry the world wherever you go. One of the best features of the iPhone is in it’s simple user interface. The device really focuses on technology “getting out of the way” and letting you do what you want, when you want. This is interesting because it allows people who would never otherwise be interested in technology to reap the benefits.
The flaw of the iPhone: it only allows me to do what Apple thinks I should be able to do. I understand that Apple is interested in that seamless user experience and that they think that creating a walled garden around their product helps them do that, but I disagree with the principle.
The reason I like all of these products so much is because they allow me the freedom to function as I want, freeing me from restrictions instead of imposing them. This is what having /stuff/ is all about. I don’t want to buy things that make my life harder! Technology, from the rock all the way up to my iPhone, is there to make life easier and better. Too often we become slaves TO our technology and our gadgets, rather than them being slaves to us as they were designed.
I think it’s important to be mindful of our tools and toys, both as consumers and as creators. The one and only goal of a tool is to make things easier and better, and any that doesn’t is taking away our freedom to function as we see fit.
I was doing some research on cell phones today. (Trying to do compare/contrast research on the mobile phone market is such an exciting adventure. Really not a fan of the industry.)? Ended up following a link to a page about the Droid, a device I’m actually quite curious about. I was greeted by this:
Holy throwing stars batman! When your website is to terrifying to contemplate how do you expect me to get interested in your device?! Nein!
Seriously though, technology needs to be elegant and transparent. Your website is invasive and confusing. End of Line, no sale for you. I have no confidence, and I haven’t even started!
The quest continues. Somewhere out there is a mobile data device that isn’t going to require my giving AT&T more money than they could possibly deserve. Forward and onward!
I’ve just deleted 3 draft posts, the oldest of which was from 2 months ago.
Here’s what happens when I “blog”. I have a situation or an idea that I find really interesting, and I write about it. Then I decide that I want to expand on it a bit. I maybe do a tiny bit of research, or think things through a bit. Then I make it longer and more thoughtful, trying to draw interesting parallels or point out strange things…
Then I delete it because it is long, it wanders, it’s uninteresting, and it just rehashes everything everyone has heard everywhere else. Nothing valuable to add, nothing truly unique to contribute, and nobody really wants anything like that anyway it seems.
So, you miss out on my rant about the parallels between gun control and health care, (wherin I cleverly coined the phrase “happiness is a cold gun”, which I was actually rather proud of..) my thoughtful ramble on why my job is utterly horrible for me even though I actually love it (wherein I rambled somewhat about geekiness and why we interact with people the way we do), and a truly utterly boring post regarding the state of television shows these days.
So, I’m blogging, really.. It’s just such utter crap that I never actually hit post, thus saving you all the effort of reading it. And then I decide to post something like this. wheee
You know, half an hour ago I was almost ready to re-install facebook and twitter on my phone and perhaps start interacting with the world again. Then I sat down to finish one of the drafts I had, now I just want to delete everything and close accounts and sites everywhere. What a weird turn…
Maybe this is how society dies?
Attention Liberals! I am with you, I agree with you, we are for the same things. For the most part I think we completely own the high road here. You’re not the ones attempting to destroy the future of our civilization simply because you’re bitter about political losses, and you’re not the ones trying to cover our racism in a thin veil of indignation.
Why though, is intellectual dishonesty okay when it comes to guns? Do you not understand that your glib mockery makes you look completely inept and hardens the attitudes anyone who might be on the fence against you?
Number one: You know nothing. Stop using the words “machine gun” and “automatic weapon”. This causes anyone who knows anything to think you are stupid. Automatic weapons/machine-guns are illegal on a federal level, and nobody was carrying any of those. Please understand what you are talking about before you open your mouth, otherwise you’re really no better than the uninformed propaganda-spewing FOX hosts we do so enjoy making fun of.
Number two: Isn’t being open-minded sort of something we’re trying for? Isn’t not being arbitrarily hateful to an entire class of people sort of one of the platforms we’re attempting to stand on? I’m completely willing to agree with you that some of the people out there carrying assault rifles to meetings may just be crazy anarchist militia members, and I don’t much care for those people any more than you do. Is it that hard for you to allow for the possibility that not everyone carrying a gun IS a crazy anarchist militia member though? Owning and/or carrying a gun does not mean that someone wants to kill your dog. Let’s keep in mind the differences between causation and correlation here.
Number three: What’s so bad about guns anyway? There have been discussions on many interesting issues such as gun rights, health care, NASA funding, and making fun of FOX hosts, and I think it’s been enjoyable for everyone. Would it surprise and terrify you to learn that during many of those conversations there was a gun present? You really shouldn’t assume that just because someone is on your side that they’re as biased as you are. Admittedly it may not have been an assault rifle, and hopefully you never knew of it’s existence, but the point was that it was there. Does that change the validity or value of the conversations?
I know that one of the standard responses is “Concealed isn’t the same as visible”. I call bullshit. Carrying visible vs carry concealed should not make a difference to anything other than the tactical approach of the carrier. When you sit across a table in a restaurant from someone discussing your view on health care you have to allow for the possibility that they may in fact be carrying a gun. You must allow for this possibility. How does knowing that they’re carrying a gun make things any worse? If they’re the type of person who you fear might do you physical harm because they disagree with you, you shouldn’t probably be having dinner with them in either case!
For anyone still concerned with the very concept of someone carrying a gun, that is a different issue which we should discuss separately. (I would refer you to Dave Grossman’s “On Sheep, Sheepdogs, and Wolves” as an entry point to this discussion.)
It’s also worth noting that I believe that a weapon is only a tool. A gun may be a more powerful tool, but in the end it’s no different than the difference between a spring rake and a shovel. Different tools, different jobs. Guns are not evil, people are evil. Go ahead and say “look at those crazy loonies!”, but reasoning that they are crazy loonies because they have guns is intellectually dishonest. An evil person will perform evil acts, by gun, by knife, or by fist, just as a good person will perform good acts using whatever tools they have available. A person is a weapon, when they so choose to apply themselves.
The point that I am trying to make here is that fanatically clinging to “guns are evil” completely ruins your credibility as an seeker of change and truth, and makes you appear to be as closed-minded as any racist. Yep, I’ll happily say it. Discrimination based on “you’re different than I am” is equally bad, no matter what that difference is.
I’m white, I’m tall, and I use and carry many variety of tools. Which of these do you think is okay to hate and deride me for?
I make no secret of the fact that I consider fantasy to generally be “fluffy”. Fluffy can be fun, but generally I like a story that has something to tell you, or something interesting to say. That said, I listen to both Escape Pod (for all my deep-thought sci-fi needs) and Podcastle (sometimes you just want to heard about dragons).?
The latest episode of Podcastle certainly fulfilled both “fun” and “thoughtful” though! Episode 49, “Return of the Warrior” is quite enjoyable, and I highly recommend that you go and listen to it! It’s only 25 minutes, which isn’t a huge time investment, so no excuses!?
This story is written very much in the “short story” form, designed to get it’s point across in the minimum of words. It manages to add enough humor to make you grin, but include enough depth to make you go “ah hah!”. And that’s all I really want to say about it. Just go listen. 🙂
For the second year in a row, Easter morning is no more than just another day. No getting up early, no stressing out about 3 different choirs that need managing, and no practicing for weeks for the giant fanfare postlude.
I think I miss it!
Continue reading Easter music junkie has withdrawls
Yes, WordPress’s <!–more–> link is handy… Didn’t know about that before. I shall now use it to help you from seeing crap that you’re not interested in. Much happier this way! (I no longer have to decide if I want to keep the pushups category on the front-page or not. I’ll just make it less annoying!)